When I was on the train this morning I had a completely different kvetch that I was going to write. The beauty of this is that wonderful kvetchy things happen and luckily you can change your focus. Before I go into this, it was brought to my attention, by my superaffengeil friend that by writing this I get all the negative energy out of me and store it here. Its stored in case I need to use it for some reason. Maybe if I have enough negative energy stored I can create a super power with it. Maybe I can channel and throw it at the Motus waking them out of their comatose state that they appear to be in. Alright, nuff said. On to today's kvetch...
I know we all are extremely important and that the phone call must be made no matter what. I'm sure the lady with the clown red frizzy hair (CAUTION....CATTY REMARK TO FOLLOW!! BLERP BLERP CAUTION.....CLAWS COMING OUT....) oh yea, thats a natural color. ANYWAY.... Here is the thing Miss Clown Hair.......when disembarking off of a train and you have your cell phone glued to your ear you need to exercise a little caution. I'm not really all that interested in what a witch samantha is, I don't even know who samantha is for hecks sake. I'm more interested that you pay attention to where you are going. Did you know that you swung your big ole "coacch" purse into the woman who was holding the childs hand? Did you realize that when you walked down the stairs off the train that you gestured into the face of the young man in the nice suit (and he was sort of dishy...) narrowly missing putting his eye out. And the best part was, due to the sounds of the engines of the train, you proceeded to screech the rest of your conversation for all to hear, making our ears bleed and I can only imagine doing what to the person on the other end. You tottered, cell phone to ear, big ole purse on your other shoulder, high heels, tight leggings walking in front of people, gesturing into their faces and generally (and we should be grateful for this I suppose) waking us all up and out of our calm reverie courtesy of a lulling train ride. I fear for your safety! I have no comments about your phone call or your right to do so, but here is a tip.......try practicing this sentence. It could save us all a bit of minor frustration and you a fall down some stairs or from walking into things.....Here we go..."Hey *****(insert name of friend here), this is a very important conversation and I want to be able to give full attention to how much we both hate samantha. However, I am about to get off the train and want to be sure that I don't maim myself or others as I descend onto the platform. Can I call you back?". Wow!! Miracle words!
You have yourself a good day Miss (BLERP BLERP CATTY ALERT ONCE AGAIN!!) Frizzy unnatural color red head!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
For Gawds sake, you don't know what kind of a witch Samantha was ??? She was married to Darrell (unsure of spelling) had a baby called Tabitha and a mother called - er - played by Agnes Moorhead, who... and this is the really spooky bit... had red clown hair. I've missed the point again haven't I?
Post a Comment